Tuesday, November 14, 2006


She looked at him through the large glass doors. Luckily the place was abuzz with people and noise. She was safe. She got behind a guy in the long line at one of the food counters. As they inched forward, she kept an eye outside. He was still facing the other side, looking sideways. Probably searching for her. And then he swung back. That was so quick, she had to literally hold the shoulder in front of her and duck behind the hapless guy who almost gasped.

"Sorry, sorry.." she muttered as he shrugged and turned to the moving line. She was still behind him, peeping out a bit from the shoulder. Oh no, he was moving to the food court. Her heart raced as she clutched her bag tighter and muttered a desperate prayer. He now stood in the entrance, roving his eyes. And then he turned and walked away toward the escalator.

"God...go, go, go..." She gnashed her teeth.


She spotted an empty table and settled in. The guy in the line spotted it too and approached. She buried her face in her meal and pretended not to see him. She felt stupid holding his shoulder now.

"Uh, excuse me?"

She looked up, pretending as if his shoulder had not existed.

"Is this taken..?"

"Oh no, please.." She moved away a little.

He sat down and started his meal. She avoided his glance. Too late.

"Uh...I don't want to sound nosey."

Oh yeah?

"But...are you in some kind of trouble, ma'am?"

"Excuse me?"

He seemed embarrassed now.

"Uh..I mean..you hid behind me. From someone, obviously" He rubbed his shoulder. "YOu are quite strong, you know."

She smiled sheepishly. Actually this guy was cute. And yeah, she was a bit tough on the clamping.

"Sorry." She pushed back a lock of hair.

"That's ok."

They laughed.

"That guy...well, forget it. It's..it's not important."

"Are you sure? He might be waiting outside, you know."

She stopped eating and contemplated for a minute. He was right. She swallowed her mouthful and pushed back the plate a bit.

"Well, he's..I don't know how to say this..but..he's my fiance."


"Yeah. Strange, isn't it? I behaved as though he were a psychopath or something."

She laughed nervously. The guy didn't talk.



"The name's Atul. You could call me that." He smiled.

"Oh.." she chuckled. "Shraddha."


They walked into the parking lot, Shraddha's eyes looking around in fear. It was almost deserted, except for the security guy at the far end, manning incoming cars.

"I can't believe someone could behave that way with his own fiancee." Atul took out the keys.
They sat in his car.

"I think I'm troubling you a lot.." Shraddha started.

"Nonsense." He smiled and before he could start the car, the passenger door opened and a guy slid in. Then, two simultaneous clicks. From the corner of his eyes, he caught the gleaming barrels, one beside him, and one in the rear-view mirror.

"Keep the hands on the wheel, Atul. And just drive."

"Easy..ok?" Atul said with just a hint of nervousness, easing the car back.

"And don't try to be funny, mister." The fiance growled from behind.

"Ok, ok..please keep the guns away."


The car hurtled down the National Highway.

About fifty miles down, when the highway was near empty, the car swung hard and spun a few times before standing still off the road.

A moment later, two quick shots rang out in the quiet afternoon. The car was soon back on the road, this time headed back to the city.

Atul was panting, but just. In five minutes, he was composed. He looked at the hole in her head and another gaping hole in the guy's neck. "Not bad," he said to himself. He drew up the tinted windows and pushed back Shraddha's seat, so it looked like she were napping.

He laughed."Amateurs."



Hyde said...

You remind me of the stories I used to write before... where in the end, somebody has to get killed. :-))

But, I don't understand the end. The motive is unclear, and it reminds me of another story, where a hired assasin kills her target and goes off on a motorbike. Didn't you write that one too?

phatichar said...

hyde: forget the logic..this is just timepass. Yeah, I wrote that one too. I wrote this just for kicks.. :)

Full2 Faltu said...

The duo are thieves who are usuing booby trap (in this case shraddha) to lure unsuspecting victim.

I guess Atul is a hitman or something.

Wrong people trying to target a wrong man.

Sorry Always trying to analyse your stories. :)


phatichar said...

punds: bulls eye, as usual :)

Anonymous said...

U and ur crime stories... :)

FlyingHigh said...

Ay, why did you have to do that to some one called 'shraddha'? Couldn't she fall in love with Atul (who happens to be very good looking) marry him and live happily ever after?

dharmu said...

i wait for you new posts as i would wait for tinkel as a kid. this one too good.

ans to ur prev quest: i wish i was in india, but currently in San Diego, USA on a project. but i dream of coming back early next year, hopefully!

Sudipta Chatterjee said...

Back to your stuff, eh? Good read

Krish said...

Gosh..what a story..does it always have to end in a murder?

Trying to understand based on Punds logic - who is Atul's accomplice? Was it the fiance? If yes, why did Atul kill him as well as Shraddha?

Too many questions..(seeing stars)...

Vin said...

Got this story... gud one!!
but have few questions: so shraddha and her fiancee were upto robbing Atul?? And Atul was a professional Plice or a theif ?

enigma said...

nice :)
But Atul could have just handed them over to the cops, why did he kill them?

phatichar said...

Smiles: :) yeah, me and my crime stories..

Shradha: Oh yeah, that kinda slipped my mind, about the name.. next time, ok? ;)

dharmu: I was an avid Tinkle reader myself.. :)

Sudipta:Ki korbo bolun to, babu moshai..aye ta aamaar trademark hoyegaeche.. :)
(Howzzat, for a twist,huh??)

Krish: The fewer questions asked in my stories, the better :)They don't contain too many answers. Sometimes, none..

Vin: umm..hitman, maybe?

enigma: My dear, then it wouldn't be a story. It'd be a news report.. :)

Janitri said...

Nice story! Actually, a collection of stories. Why murder..??

d4u said...

Not gonna ask any questions;)

phatichar said...

janitri: donno..tht's just me.. :)welcome here.

deeps: :)

Di said...


Sachin R K said...

Wow !!! Looks like I have discovered a little gold mine here :)

phatichar said...

sachin: heehhe..u flatter me :) thanx..

Mampi said...

Yeh kya kiya?

Martin Cooper said...

I apologise, but, in my opinion, this theme is not so actual.

aks said...