Friday, April 20, 2012

Forever Red


The blue Indica was at the traffic signal at around 10 pm.

“Sir, toy gun for your kids?” said a hawker

 “Don’t want.”

 “I insist,” the hawker said, pulling the trigger.
  
****

From the shadows, he watched the traffic pile up angrily behind the stationery Indica. He fished out his mobile phone.

“It’s done.”

****

19 comments:

Visha said...

Gory 55

the little princess said...

Sirjee, crisp and to the point! nice.. btw long absence?

sumitra said...

Awesome! Nice to see you back.

Kanthu said...

So wat shall I say..?? I strongly feel like saying, "I told you so"...;-)

And about the 55 fictions, "Short and Stunning", literally...;p

phatichar said...

Visha: :P

Princess: Thank you..ah yes, been a bit busy lately :)

Sumitra: Thank you, ma'am. :)

Kanthu: LOL..ok ok, you can go ahead and say that.. ;-)

Thanks, pal.

Tongue-fu Lady said...

oh wow, reminds me of the contract killer from Kahaani, Bob Biswas :P

phatichar said...

TFL: LOL..seriously? Wait, ek minute... :P

Rohu said...

wou!! short and sweet! :D

CD!!! said...

hehe.....agree with Tongue-fu-Lady......It did remind me of Bob Biswas :)

phatichar said...

Rohu: :)

CD: *sigh...the powers of bollywood - now Bob Biswas is a benchmark - and here I was, thinking my killers (much older than BB) were deadly. :P :P

Rahul said...

Nomoskar.Ami Bob Biswas.Ek minute. ;-)

cmus said...

Slowly shifting to crime fiction? :)

phatichar said...

Rahul: :p et tu?

Cmus: shifting? Naah, had only drifted away from it...slowly getting 'back' to it - archives full odilla ansuthe? :)

Soumya said...

Comparing your posts to Bollywood would be an insult.

To your posts ofcourse :D

Awesome writing.

alice said...

hey.. IMO, the story would have been better without the 'From the shadows...' part. That way you could leave the reader wonder whether the hawker was psycho, or he had a 'supari' or something else entirely. :)

phatichar said...

Alice: thx...not sure if it's a good idea to puzzle the reader in a 55# thingy in the first place - too little room to play around as it is :p

Varsha Naik said...

hmnn....too many contract killers..

Crisp one!

The Meditating Lion said...

Bloody hell! :D Im so glad i came here

phatichar said...

Varsha: hehehe :P

ML: Welcome! Finally.. :)Thanks a lot.